Still here

Yes, it is me. Your not imagining this entry, lol. I know I have been away for quite a while. I guess I will just tell you the truth why. It's Facebook. I am addicted to their games, such as Farmville, Farmtown, Fish Isle, Treasure Island and Family Feud. Alot of good friends I had in Jland are in facebook also. So, if you haven't gotten emails from me lately, it is because we had major computer problems. We had a power outtage due to the heatwaves we've been having. Well, my computer was on during one of them when the power went out. It not only crashed my whole system but it also wiped out all my information. So, I have lost all email addresses and pictures I had saved. So, if you will, please email me at emabecmar@aol.com so I can build my email list again.
 Update on my sister Helen. She ended up back in the hospital with chest pains. She's ok now and back at home. If she'd of listened to the doctor's orders, she wouldn't of had that second time in hospital. He told her no going to work for at least 6 month's. She was back to work after only a month. Man, that girl is stubborn. lol.  So, the girls are going into 3rd grade come September. They both received excellent report cards the last semester of school. Rebecca received the highest award given, which made both her daddy and I very proud.
This past April I had a major health issue. Both my hands and arms turned blue. My blood was so thick, dangerously thick the doctor put it. I spent a week in the hospital and they gave me both Heprin and Coumadin while there to thin the blood. I'm still having issues with the blood, but I am still on the coumadin also. Another medical issue is, the jugular vein on the right side of my neck where I had the cancer surgery and radiation is badly damaged. So damaged that I have to see a specialist on Sept 9th, to discuss what to do about it. The doctor said it will probably come down to having surgery to remove the fried section of the vein. Like I really want more surgery, ugh. Recently my doctor told me I was Type 2 diebetic and also diagnosed me with having Asthma. I swear, if it's not one thing it's another when it comes to me.
Well, my stress level doesn't help much either. Kids (lil ones) always screaming and crying. Toys thrown everywhere, so much you can't see the floor. The only peace and quiet I get anymore is after 11pm or so when the youngest finally goes to sleep. I spend alot of time downstairs in my room just to keep what sanity I have left. I have searched and searched for a decent affordable place to live, but haven't had any luck at all. So, I found my old landlords address in New Jersey and I wrote him a letter. I pray he has a place available. I want my own place, Rebecca wants her own room and Jim just wants to be able to come home, sit in a chair and watch the news when he gets home from work. Right now he can't do that. Not with kids screaming and cartoons on all day and night. My oldest is upset that I want to move back to NJ. She thinks I am doing it out of spite. I am not doing that. I need my own place, I want my own things, which are still in storage. I WANT A CLEAN AND ORGANIZED HOUSE AGAIN. And most of all I want peace and quiet.
Now I feel really bad and just want to cry. I yelled at Rebecca because Adrianna kept screaming that she wants Rebecca's barbie things and doll furniture. It got on my nerves so bad I yelled at my kid to take her things back downstairs, and she did crying all the way. Lord, just give me the strenghth to cope with all this just a while longer. Please let my old landlord call me to say he has a place available.
Well, my head is ringing right now. I can't think of anything else to write about. So, I guess I will go now. I think I will take Rebecca out for a drive so she and I can talk. No privacy here to even talk.
Hope all are well.

GOD BLESS.


CINDY