My Dream or was it?

I wasn't going to write about this, but it's really bothering me, and I cannot stop thinking about it. Dreams usually don't bother me, unless I dream someone dies or is hurt. Like when my niece was about ready to have her first child. I had a dream she died on the delivery table. She didn't, but 12 days after giving birth to her son, she died. I had a dream my Dad was shot and killed, a week later he was found floating in the creek face down in the water. They said it was accidental. I DO NOT BELIEVE IT. My father was scared of water. He didn't even get into a bathtub or shower. He stood at kitchen sink with a pan of hot soapy water and a washcloth and that's how he washed himself. But this dream I had earlier this week has really thrown me for a loop. I have so many questions running through my head, that I can't think straight.I think it has been the cause of my not being able to sleep the past few nights. I am not going to use their names. Only first name initial. It is how I will show my respect to my sister. Yes, my sister. This dream is about my baby sister who went to heaven last year. She had her journal here called Strawberry Shortcake, but left jland. God I miss her so much.

The dreams starts out where I am awakened by the scent of strawberries. When I opened my eyes I was at Susie's MIL's house. There were adults walking around, little children playing and laughing. I did not see my niece's S or E, or my BIL M. Adults would walk by me not even noticing I was there. Some I met when we went to my niece S birthday party there, some I never met before. All of a sudden a little a little boy came up to me and said hey I know you, then he ran off. There was something about that little boy that was very familiar. It was like I knew him, but I didn't know him. A minute or so later he returned holding hands with my nieces S and E. They looked up at me and said, Mommy? And gave me the biggest hug, said they loved me and missed me and where have I been. They said Mommy your beautiful, your so skinney, and how come your shining like a light. I looked around and next to me was a mirror hanging on the wall. I looked into the mirror and it was not me that I saw. It was my sister Susie. I had become her. I was her, at least in the dream? Those beautiful little girls, so happy to see their mommy asking so many questions. Slowly a strange feeling came over me, and a second later I was standingwatching my beautiful sister hug and kiss her girls, telling them she was ok. She was happy and she loved them, and to be good for daddy. Be good girls in school and study hard. And one day when it was time they would see her again and always be together. She told them to go play and have lots of fun. And everytime they smelled a strawberry it was mommy blowing them kisses. As she was saying this I felt a hand touch mine. It was the little boy again. He put his hand into mine and held it tight. He said don't worry, she's ok she's happy up there, I'm happy up there. I was so confused, I asked what do you mean your happy up there? He says, Don't worry, I'm happy, everyone there is happy. Then he said I have to go now, he's calling us back. I yelled Wait, who are you? And his last words were, I love you Mommom. I knew then who it was. Why he was so familiar to me. He was my first grandchild, my first grandson. And his name was Michael Joseph. He was familiar because he looked just like his mommy, my daughter Emma. In a flash he was gone. I looked around the room and so was Susie gone. Two people I loved dearly came to visit me that night and in a flash were gone. I sat up quickly in bed, looking around to see where I was and I was in my own bedroom. Jim asleep by my side and Rebecca sleeping so peacefully in her bed. I got up, poured myself a glass of pepsi. I was shaking. Was that a dream? Because it sure didn't feel like it. It felt like I was actually there. I could smell all the scents of food cooking, people's perfume, and I could smell the scent of strawberries very strongly. What was this dream about? Why dream it now. Why come to me in my sleep? So many questions I have. Or am I just to the point where I am losing my mind or having a nervous breakdown? Why did it seem so real?

A question keeps going through my mind. Should I write my BIL and tell him about this dream? A part of me wants too, but yet another part says don't do it. I don't know what to do or think about this. Got any suggestions or advice? I'd appreciate some.

Love to all.................

           

Thank you Sugar for my lovely tag. It's my favorite flower.

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