Will it ever end?

Always something going on around here that involves a doctor or trip to the hospital. My SIL was at a midnight AA meeting. He's been sober now for 7 years. He started having severe chest pains and couldn't breathe. One of his friends there took him out to the car and drove him to the hospital, then came and got Emma. He had Dan's car. Dan hasn't looked well all day today. Very quiet, tired, hardly eatting at all. The chest pains were so bad, he knew he couldn't drive home to get Emma. So, here I sit at the computer and Adrianna is in her pack n play sleeping next to me. I will be up until One or both of them returns home.
My results are back from the second mammogram and ultrasound. There is a spot the size of a dime. It can't be determined if it is cancer or not. They know it is not a cyst. So on Jan 21 I go into the hospital, so they can remove a piece or even the whole spot, so it can be tested to see if it is cancer. I am a nervous wreck over this. I have been doing alot of praying a whole lot of praying over this. So many thoughts are rushing through my head. Will I lose my entire breast? Will I die of breast cancer? How will my family cope with this? Will I go on getting chemo again, and being sick and dependant on my family again, when it's me who is to care for them? Then there's the big question, WHY ME? I cry then pray, cry again and pray again. I hope GOD hears my prayers. I want to be around and watch my Rebecca grow up, and to watch my grandbabies grow up too. I want to be around for my oldest child Emma and for my husband. Jim just came upstairs, I told him about Dan so he's worried. Emma called, they are putting Dan in a room and hooking him up to all the necessary machines. She said she asked him if he knew who she was and he shook his head no. He talks but his words make no sense. To me it sounds as if he had a stroke. I hope not. Please say a prayer for him and for me too. Jim said he noticed Dan didn't seem right tonight. He said he was slow acting.
Well, our weather here in PA was awful for a couple days, snow and freezing rain. Today it was partly sunny and in the 20's. Gas here in Philadelphia has gone up a few cents, but it's still 1.39 across the bridge in New Jersey. So I go there to get mine. Only cost me 25.00 the other day to fill my tank and I have a big tank in my van. This friday will be 2 weeks since I filled it and I still have 3/4 of a tank. I'll top it off again this friday. Well, I guess that is about it for now. I will come back here and update you on Dan when I know something.

LOVE TO ALL.........................CINDY