Wednesday, October 11, 2006

                                     I'm sorry my instant message is off tonight, and I haven't posted the story I said I was going to post. But tonight I am just in a bad way. I actually want to cry, and I most likely will before I go to bed. Maybe even cry myself to sleep. I was told something tonight that has really hurt me. Jim told me tonight that he had to defend me a couple weeks ago to 2 people he thought were his friends. The three of them were up to the cabin and got to talking. One of them said he can't atand his girlfriend cause she gets on his nerves. Jim sort of laughs cause he has met this girlfriend and she is a little wierd. He looks at Jim and says why are you laughing? Look at your wife, she's over weight, scarred up by cancer and sit's around all day doing nothing. I do nothing? He has been here 2 times, both at night, what am I suppose to be scrubbing floors or ironing at night? Screw him!!!!!!!!!!!! The other friend says nothing except shrugs his shoulder's and nods his head. Jim got mad and said, look you can talk about your girlfriend all you want, but my wife was sick, she could of died, and she is still healing from the ordeal she went through, so you need to mind your own business and not worry what my wife does with her time. Well, Jim says ever since that time at the cabin, he's being ignored. He was told tonight, that Brad was looking for a one bedroom apartment to rent, and our rent hasn't gone up, but the utilities have in the past 2 month's. Ummm wasn't it just summer? Were we suppose to sit up here in 100* weather and sweat to death? This coming from a person I have over for dinner quite a few evenings a week. Who's mother I take care of when she is here and he is at work. He was gonna sell us his truck, but Brad told him get it fixed, you can get 4 grand for it, instead of 600.00. So he's been having it worked on. We were told the turtle aquarium runs constantly, and is making the electric bill higher, that the kitchen always has a light on, yes it does at night. A small appliance bulb over top the stove, so Becca can see when she gets up to go potty. And I am always on the computer, Am I suppose to just sit here and look at a screen with nothing on it? We already replaced every light up here with energy efficient bulbs, we don't keep every light on in the place at night, some nights I don't even use the stove, we have a sandwich. The TV is on, because Rebecca is watching noggin or cartoons or the disney channel. We don't control the heat. The thermostat is down at Joe's. He keeps it set on 65 during the day and 62 at night. The only time he ever turnes it up higher is if his Mom is there. Most of the winter we sit up here under a blanket to keep warm, but we don't complain to him about it, because it is his house. Last year he was going to buy a house and give us the mortgage book and we'd pay the mortgage for it and it would be ours. He never mentioned it again. As soon as we do our taxes the end of January and the money is deposited into our account, we are out of here. I think it's time we left. I am very upset over all this. Especially what was said about me. I do not sit around all day. How can I? I have a child, I take her outdoors, we go for walks, I'm forever cleaning up after her. Yes, I am over weight, why does it bother him? I'm not his wife. I am Jim's wife.

I'm sorry to rant on like this, but I am just so hurt over this. His sorry ass ate here the two times he's been over, even had seconds, and he's gonna say something so mean about me. I have now got a headache over this. I guess I'll go to bed now, and shut everything off, so I don't run up the electric bill. Sorry this is a depressing entry. Good night everyone.

24 comments:

  1. Oh Cindy!  When it rains it pours huh....I am so sorry this jerk said those awful mean things.  God tells us we should pray for our enemies.  Sometimes that is not an easy thing to do, but I have said prayer for those who were hateful and ugly to me and seen them change their attitude towards me.  Many many times.  Do not let his evil spirit bring you down.  Your husband loves you, Rebecca loves you and I LOVE YOU too!!!!! Barbara

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  2. OK STOP THE PRESSES AND HOLD THE DARNEDPHONE .....WHERE DOES THAT SORRY JERK GET OF THINKING THAT HE CAN TALK ABOUT MY SISTER IN LAWLIKE THAT????I'D SURE LIKE 15 TO 20 ALONE WITH HIS ASS .....OH MANNNN HE'S SUCH AN ******OHHHHH I'M DO MAD I CAN'T EVEN SAY IT.....I'M ADMITTING SOMETHING TO YOU ALL IN JLAND RIGHT NOW...I'M NOT SKINNY ( and probably never will be) BUT I'M LIVING MY LIFE TO THE FULLEST....THIS IS MY SISSY AND YES SHE IS BIG LIKE ME ( we are twins lol....just ask her to show you a pic) SO HOW DARE HE SAY THOSE THINGS ABOUT SOMEONE THAT I LOVE
    SISSY I'M SO SORRY ......CALL ME TOMORROWIF YOU CAN...I LOVE YOU MUAHHHH NANCY LOU

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  3. Cindy.. I'm not even going to try and say something to comfort you, because hearing that someone said something mean like that is just...well.....mean..and hurtful.  I don't blame you for being hurt and feeling like crying.  
    What I don't understand is why your husband felt the need to tell you something like that?  He had to know it was going to hurt your feelings.  I mean, was it absolutely necessary that he tell you?  Now you are probably lying in bed thinking hearing those words over and over in your head, and crying.  That is just so sad.  I am sorry that you had to hear that someone made a comment like that.. and I really think the comment itself was just rude, mean and uncalled for, and Jim should of popped that guy upside the head for saying something like that!

    Hugs
    Jackie

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  4. Cindy I'm so sorry you had to find that out!  I don't know why Jim would have even TOLD you to be honest.  But, he did. And maybe it's better because now you know the truth about these creeps.  I'd stay away from them....never have them into my home again. EVER!!

    I'm not really sure I understand your living situation so I can't even comment on the electric bills.  Are you guys living with someone?

    Just ignore the awful comments those men made.  They are obviously very miserable people.
    Pam

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  5. i wouldn't have the jerk over for dinner ever again. yes i agree move as quickly as possible. keeping you in my prayers

    Deb

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  6. ((((((((((((((( CINDY )))))))))))))))))))))) I KNOW your hurting, I will NOT downplay that but remember this....."""LITTLE PEOPLE ARE NOT WORTH YOUR TEARS, LITTLE SMALL PEOPLE ARE NOT WORTH YOUR TIME"""""" Those who DOWN other people, make fun of other people are suffering there OWN insecurities.  But still I know the hurt. You know what I say ...*F*** H***. He's lucky I don't live in PA or I would put a whoop azz on him <straightening halo>

    Okay, does Brad own your place??  Most all peoples utitilites have gone up and go up each year. Don't down size the way you live, your not a animal or a pet, your a human and DEMAND to be treated like one. Don't let these people walk over you. Look how strong you are Cindy, you have made it through so much, you have inner strength that few do, and now is the time to pull it out and use it.  

    Don't give  ANYONE permission to HURT YOU.

    Much Love
    Angie

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  7. P.S. Can I have Nancy Lous number so her and I can go put a whoop azz on this pig?????? I like her :) She sounds like ME!!!!!!!!!! Oh, and don't apologize for turning your IM off, it's your right.
    Much Love and more hugs
    Ang

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  8. Jim defended you and that is lovely ~ I would not have those people in my home again ever ~ they are unworthy of any friendship you ever had with them ~ Ally

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  9. Coming by to give you some love. {{{{}}}}
    Sugar

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  10. Cindy,  I am so sorry to hear about those comments.  Jim stood up for you, you know how much he loves you.  As far as that guy goes I would not have him over ever again.  Who is Brad?  Just remember all your friends on here love you.  Sending you a big hug ((())).

    Michelle

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  11. What a horrible thing.  He is no friend to you or your husband and I would ditch him.  Glad your husband stood up for you. Remember you have lots of good friends on here who do not judge you and like you for being you.
    http://journals.aol.co.uk/jeanno43/JeannettesJottings/

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  12. My ex's family would say the same thing about me, but the difference was my ex would agree with them.  Because I didn't work I was considered lazy.  Hello?  We had a huge house I had to take care of by myself, who would pick up the kids and make sure they did their homework and drive them all over town?  Anyway, don't let it get you down, that guy just sounds like a pig.

    Amy

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  13. ((Cindy))
    I am so sorry! He is no friend to you or your husband. I know it hurts and I'm sorry that he hurt you like that.

    Hugs and prayers,
    Gretchen

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  14. I am fairly new to your journal still, been reading it for about a month or two (I think), but I'm just so sad for you right now.  I can't believe those men said those things about you.  And honestly they never were true friends to either you or your husband (obviously that isn't a news flash at this point).  No true friend would talk to your husband and say cruel things about his wife.  And it is none of their concern!  I hate it when people say insensitive things about other people.  They haven't walked in that persons shoes to even know what they go through every day.  Of course you shouldn't be cleaning late at night, that guy who said it is lucky enough that he even has a woman who wants to be his girlfriend if that is the way he thinks.  And even if you didn't do anything during the day (which we know is untrue with a young child at home with you) it is none of their concern!  The ignorance of some people!!  I'm really very sorry that these things were said about you.  And yaayyy for your hubby for sticking up for you to them!!  
    xoxo, Heather

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  15. Hi Cindy,
    The guys a jerk!  Good for your husband.  i hear alot of that about being a stay at home Mom, it's crap because there's always something to do!  Try to consider the source.
    Would you believe it is snowing here in Detroit??
    Chin up!
    XO
    Donna

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  16. This isnt about you, im pretty sure he was looking to bitch gossip cause his life sucks and his girlfriend sucks, and he wanted your hubbies attention. He wanted to talk crap about wives so he could feel better about himself. He is a jerk, though. With all youve been through, im shocked he would even open his mouth to insult you like that. Very rude manners. And he eats with you.. The next ime he comes over, say "sorry, I dont do anything but lay around, so no food for you!!!..jack ass!!"
    Love ya, you deserve hugs and love, not insults from stupid people who dont have a life of their own... now im pissed off!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    Christine

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  17. That's a horrible thing to hear.  If it was me, I wouldn't have wanted my husband to even tell me.  It would be better I didn't know.  Besides, I'd probably strangle  the jerk.  Don't worry about what someone else thinks of you.  He doesn't know you real well, he doesn't live there to see what you do.  He apparently feels so bad about himself and his girlfriend, he needed to turn it around on someone else.  Try to have a good day.
    Missie

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  18. Cindy...
    I too, am upset, upon hearing of the pain you're in.   No one deserves that...especially someone as kind as you.   I do tend to agree w/ some of the other comments about why your husband told you the details of his insults.  I'm thinking he wanted you to know how he defended you and also maybe to help explain why this guy will no longer be in your lives.    Maybe a little "editing" on his part could have been helpful.
    Anyway, that stuff will always hurt no matter what.   I've always loved the quote by Eleanor Roosevelt that says "No one can make you feel inferior without your consent".   Unfortunately, that's not always so easy.
    Stick with the people that bring you up.   You deserve to be up.    
    Love,
    Nancy

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  19. I'm so upset that they'd treat you like that.  Of course your husband was mad.  It is time you all left from there.  This sounds like a storn that has been brewing for a long time and is only about to blow up to even a bigger one.  They don't appreciate you.  I do.  Many of us do out here.  Cry if you need to.  Vent if you need to.  If you ever see me over on IM please speak.  I'd love to talk to you.
    NELISHIA
    http://journals.aol.com/nelishianatl/WISHINGANDHOPING/

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  20. It's Trick or Treat time through J-land
    BOO!!
    ~d

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  21. I'd be upset to if my hubby told me somthing like that, but I wouldnt beable to let it rest at that I would have to face it out with who ever it was that had be calling me, I think you are planning on doing the best thing in looking for somewhere else to rent, good luck with your search
    take care Lynne xx

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  22. That PERSON had no right to say those horrible things about you, but Jim took care of him...that was so sweet.  I do hope you are feeling better...trying to do catch up...pleaee take care.  Hugs and love,
    Joyce

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  23. I'm angry with you. How dare that person say anything about you. He doesn't know what you do all day. How dare he mention the cancer scars. Looks what  you had to go through. He is not worth it. Your so much better then that jerk. Hugs to you and I'm so sorry.

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  24. Honey, don't let those MEN get you down. I'm sorry, but a man has no idea what a woman, wife or mother does. They go about their own business doing whatever they want to do at the moment without having to think about anybody else. A woman on the other hand puts everyone else above her. So don't let some asshole get you down. Like you said you're Jim's wife, nobody elses and they can mind their own business. I'll be glad when you all can move somewhere else.
    Take care, Chrissie

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